Carey Nieuwhof

Big, Contentless Void?

So the latest You Tube king is a 14 year old named Fred who has over 45 million views. Robert Scoble and Seth Godin both use Fred to show that in marketing, volume is not king.  Almost nobody will get 45 million viewers.  Nobody.  The problem for them is that Fred isn't making money nor is You Tube. That's not what concerns me.

My observation: Fred has no content.  I mean, he's one part funny, one part entertaining, one part sad (what needs to be true in his life for a 14 year old kid to make endless streams of cynically funny videos?) and one part annoying.  I'd love to meet Fred though...he seems on many levels like a great kid.

It's just weird how you can get 45 million hits with no content.  I mean, Fred really doesn't have anything to say.  There's no message.

And yet those of us who track with a blog like this one believe there is a message that changes the world.  There is ONE who changes the world.  Does He get the kind of attention Fred gets? 

I'm thinking about all the thousands of hours people have spent watching Fred this month.  Nothing wrong with entertainment, but ultimately I want my life to be about something - someONE - who matters.  When I reflect on my own life, how much of my time is spent on things that matter?  I'm going to hit thousands of websites and invest thousands of hours this year on something.  How can I make it better count?

I don't want my life to be about millions of hits that really don't lead anywhere?

How does this make you think about spending your time and energy, especially given the fact that summer is now in full effect?

Self-Feeders

Question - who is responsible for your spiritual growth?

One of the thing that breaks my heart in our self-serve culture is the observation that many North American Jesus-followers expect someone else to grow them spiritually.  The number one question I hear church goers ask is "what's in it for me?"  Should that be the #1 question?  Don't we have a responsibility as Christians to become self-feeders, people who realize that we have a personal role in growing our relationship with Jesus?  Is our mission not other-centered rather than self-centered?

Is it actually true that, primarily, my spiritual growth is not your responsibility?  To use an analogy, isn't that like saying that my spiritual growth your responsibility like saying it's the gym's responsibility to help me lose weight and get in shape? I can join a gym, hire a trainer, but if I don't actually show up, or if I choose not to exercise or go at it with half a heart, or work out like crazy and then go for burgers, fries and milkshakes, whose fault is it if I gain 20 lbs?  Is our job as a Christian community to provide the conditions for spiritual growth, but trust people to take the initiative to feed themselves spiritual, both individually and in community? 

What I love about church is that we have people to encourage us, environments (like Sundays and community groups) to provide the stimulus to growth.  All of that is fantastic.  But I get this sinking feeling that many Jesus-followers in this generation haven't taken personal responsibility for the state of their relationship with God.

So tell me, am I crazy?  Am I wrong on this?  What do you do in your life that helps you grow in relationship with Jesus?  What barriers do you face in the way to growing your faith personally every day? 

Is it Compelling?

These signs just keep grabbing my attention as I bike through the countryside near my home. 

Soybeans...watch it grow.  Seriously?

Not only is the grammar off (isn't soybeans plural?), but I couldn't actually imagine how boring my life would have to be to think that sitting by the side of the road watching soybeans grow would be compelling. 

Sadly, I wonder if that's sometimes what the people who don't attend our churches think of our church as they drive by.  How boring would my life have to be to actually go to church?  Is there anything compelling that would grab them or draw them in? 

I mean what do we put on our signs? Everyone welcome.  That's gripping.

Or for a lot of contemporary church leaders, we like the convey the fact that we're cool.  But can't you get cool just about anywhere these days?  I mean it's good we're not complete nerds, but is that honestly what people are looking for?

This sign made me think about what would cause people to drop everything to get in on what's going on in our communities.

All I could think of was this:  love.  Love fully expressed in Jesus.  Grace, forgiveness, healing, authentic relationship.  People are dying for love.  You can't put love on a sign, but you can live it.  Express it.

What if people who came in any form of contact with Christians completely felt loved?  What would happen?  What if we went way beyond the walls of our facilities and loved radically?

It would certainly be more compelling that watching soybeans grow.  Or knowing people are welcome. Or that we're cool.

Love.  What do you think would cause people to come running to get in on what God is doing?

We Have an Image Problem

I spent yesterday afternoon at home with a crew from Global TV.  They were doing some of their final shooting for a documentary to be broadcast this fall (October is the tentative broadcast month). They're calling the documentary "Hip to be Holy" (quirkily neat title).  They interviewed a bunch of churches doing innovative stuff, but are using Connexus as the focal point.

Spent two hours being interviewed.  They're a great crew so it was a lot of fun, but the questions intrigued me.  A lot of the interview focused on the way we do church v. "normal" which was cool.

But about a third of the interview had to do with hot button issues in the culture.  What was my view on abortion...gay marriage...would I baptize a practicing homosexual...should Canada become a Christian nation...what about a political agenda for new kinds of churches...what do I think of the televangelists (I'm not telling my answers, you'll have to tune in, if they even make the edit).

Yesterday drove home the fact that so many of us Jesus-followers are known for what we are against. They asked me what a stereotypical image of an evangelical Christian might be that a non-Christian would have.  I had two answers:

1. I'm not sure non-churched people think about us that much.
2. When they do, it's not good.  We're seen as judgmental, hypocritical, agenda-driven and even angry.

Even with the progress that we and numerous other churches have made (thank you, God!) in terms of redefining Sundays, ministry and community, we still have this HUGE image problem.  I know if people could just get to Jesus, they'd love Him (or at least many would).  But so often I stand in the way still.  Our image stands in the way.

How do we tackle this?  How can our lives, our communities of Jesus-followers, better show Christ's love?  What can we do?  How can I live differently?

Just some questions as the sinking-realization of the enormity of the task sets in once again.

Maybe this documentary will help reverse some of that stereotype.  Maybe this weekend at Connexus or your church do to turn the tide?  But what can all of us do to turn the tide?

Can You Live in An Antiseptic Christan Bubble?

We've had a lot of conversations at our Service Programming meetings (where we plan the weekend services) about what elements to include in our weekend services. I've also got a dialogue going with several friends who are not nearly as comfortable engaging culture.

Here's the kind of discussions we're having. For our heaven and hell series coming up in August (calling it Stairway to Heaven/Highway to Hell) we've already scratched doing Highway to Hell live, only because we weren't sure it was appropriate.  This line put us over the edge: Hey satan, payed my dues/playing in a rocking band/Hey momma, look at me/I'm on my way to the promised land.  So even though we titled the sermon that way, we're not going to use the song intact (we may mangle it or play with it a bit somehow). It pushes us out a bit far as Jesus-followers, we thought.  But we are firmly committed to engaging culture to reach the culture.

Some Christians are definitely in the camp of "all culture is bad".  But I just can't live in an antiseptic bubble where everything is filtered out.  The line many of us quote most often in the Bible says God loves the world, but you'd never know it the way many Christ-followers live.

A lot of mainstream music is sugar sweet pop or a blatant celebration of sin, but a lot isn't.  It all tells us something about the longings of the human heart and the issues people are really struggling with.  Take Coldplay's new CD, for example.  The lyrics of a song like Yes or Cemeteries of London.  The fact that artists (musical and novelists and so many more) are asking theological questions should make leaders sit up and take notice.  God is on their agenda.  We're not, but shouldn't we be?

Similarly, with things like doing tattoos during a service and handing out chocolate as an illustration tied to sex before marriage, we're trying to make ties between everyday life and culture. Because God is about making the link between life and culture.

I know most of the people who read this blog engage culture deeply.  I'm sure some are not quite as convinced.  What are your boundaries?  What works for you, doesn't work for you?  What engages you?  What connects?

I Survived a Boring Church Service to Watch a Japanese Game Show

It occurred to me a few years ago that although I had grown up in church, church and fun generally didn't go together.   So we tried to make our experiences as a community of Jesus followers more fun. Then we met some friends a few years ago who made us look boring. North Point, Connexus' big-daddy church affiliate, and our good friends at Orange, know how to have fun.  They notched it up a level or two.

Last night my kids and I sat down to watch I Survived a Japanese Game Show, a really kitch show about ten Americans who end up on a zany Japanese Game show.  It was just funny at every level, and it made me think again about how church people rarely think outside the box.  Not that we're going for crazy stunts, but our God is way more creative and imaginative than most of his followers are.

As I was writing this post, I just got off the phone with a woman I haven't met who attends our Orillia Campus.  She brought her boyfriend for the first time two weeks ago.  He hadn't been to church for years, and his comment was "this isn't like any church I've ever been at before, period."  For him that was a good thing.  One of the things he had was "fun".  The service engaged him and didn't have any boring religious mumbo jumbo. It bothers me that so many unchurched people write off church because, among other things, we're just boring.

As you think about making fun, shock, surprise and delight as words that might one day describe some of your church experiences, here's why I'm committed to becoming more creative as time goes on:

• Humour disarms people.  If people laugh, their defenses go down and they are far more ready to hear a hard truth.
• Fun helps makes environments irresistible.  It makes people want to come back.  Truthfully, most non-church attenders never want to go back to a church they've just visited.
• Fun should be appropriate, and ideally it should make a point.  Best yet is when it accentuates the key point in your message.
• Fun, humour, shock and surprise makes things memorable.  A couple weeks ago during our God and Sex series, we handed out gourmet chocolate bars with a cryptic message on them, encouraging people to wait and not open them.  Naturally, by the time we explained what we were doing, many had opened it and chowed down all or part of their bars.  The message was on waiting with sex for marriage, and then we revealed that everyone who didn't open their chocolate bars would be given another one on the way out - similar to the way sex is more of a blessing if people wait for marriage. I poked gentle fun at people who had opened their chocolate bar and been "caught."  It was a cool and funny moment, and I think it helped people remember the "wait" message well!  Then, as an act of grace, we gave everyone an extra chocolate bar as they left.

The last thing I want church to be is boring.  Because God, actually, is not boring.  Not in the least.

How comfortable are you with 'fun' in church?  What are other things things has humour and fun helped you accomplish in church?

Why Do I Feel Energized These Days?

I noticed something weird last week. As I thought about it, I realized it had been happening for a while.  Yesterday confirmed it again.

Over the last few months, Sundays have energized me.  They leave me with more energy, more joy, more enthusiasm than I had when I got there early in the morning.  Now that may sound weird to the non preachers reading this post, because after all, that's what worship is supposed to do, right?

But the truth is, for years prior to this (okay, maybe a decade), Sundays left me drained and rather anti-social.  I would get home exhausted and burned out.  I would sleep on the couch and generally retreat.  It would often last two days.  Even though I would go to work the next day, my knuckles would drag. And I know from talking to many preachers over the years that I'm not alone.  I thought it came with the territory, and I eventually ended up justifying some of it as biblical. 

So I started to wonder, why am I driving home with a smile on my face these days?  Why did I love not only preaching two services, but then going to a park and serving our volunteers for three hours yesterday? I even have to get up way earlier to do this! It's not like the first seven months of Connexus were a cake walk.  Far from it. What kind of energy and joy is this that is emerging?  Where is it coming from?  The truth is, I really don't know, but I'm grateful for it.  Here are some tentative reasons:

• We are actually impacting the unchurched at a deeper level than before.  I have had more conversations with people who have no church background in the last six months than in the previous five years combined.
• Our volunteers and leadership team are aligned at a better level than before, really wanting to do this kind of ministry.  We spend almost no time justifying the kind of ministry we're doing and almost all our time trying to figure out how to do it better.
• Our ministry is more focused than ever before.  The few environments we run are designed to facilitate our mission.  That means our time and resources are focused on a goal we find worth pursuing.
• People are giving with their lives and resources at a deeper level than ever before.  And having hundreds of people using their gifts in tight alignment with a common mission and strategy is incredibly empowering.  I honestly an amazed every week to see people serve hard and long with huge smiles on their faces.

I guess I'm deeply grateful to the people who are making this journey to become Connexus.  You energize me.  And I'm grateful to God for the opportunity to roll up our sleeves and dig deep into what I pray will be a long, dramatic run into the lives of the 85% of our friends, family and neighbours who are not in a growing relationship with Jesus.

What energizes or drains you in ministry, as a staff member or volunteer?

Can You Just Pray for Love?

I am totally grateful for your replies so far on If I Could Only Pray About One Thing. Some great things, and I'm delighted to see so many "big" prayers.  That's cool.

I think my one prayer might be very simple: Lord, fill me with love. 

Sometimes I think if I could love, I'd do so much better at everything:

• Would love force me to lay down my selfishness?
• Would love help me see the good in others more clearly?
• Would love help me set healthy boundaries?
• Would love make me more generous?
• Would love help me control my personal actions?
• Does love unlock the fruits of the Spirit?  (Compare Galatians 5: 16-25 with 1 Corinthians 13.)

Here's my question: if you prayed for Christ's love to fill you completely, what other request would that not "cover" or put into perspective?

Really curious.  Haven't tested this before.  I'd love to think this one through with you.  Is a prayer to be filled with Christ's love really the 'ultimate' prayer?

If You Could Only Pray About One Thing...

Had this crazy thought, inspired somewhat by the idea behind the One Prayer initiative.  If you could only pray about ONE thing in your life...if you had to narrow it all down to one request, what would you pray for/about?

My thinking: is there a common heartcry?  Do we yearn for the same thing?  Deep down, what do people actually want most?

I would love to hear from all of you on this one.  Please be honest - don't be afraid to post what your deepest heart cry is. I'd love to hear your thoughts.  When we're done, I'll share mine.

Post away....

A Question That Gives Answers to Dreamers

So earlier, I blogged about our Muskoka launch and pursuing a dream.

If you're like me, you get a lot of ideas and even a few dreams.  But how do you if any of your ideas and dreams are actually from God?

Earlier on in my faith journey, I used to wait for "signs" from God and "confirmations" from God.  It sounded very spiritual - do nothing unless God has told you to do it.  But there are two truths around this:

1. Few of us actually apply this practice consistently in life.  When we are hungry, we pop food in the microwave.  When we feel like heading into town, we rarely pray about it.  We just go.  Why are some decisions "spiritual" and some not?
2. It's highly subjective.  It's feeling based.  How do I know I've heard from God and am not just in a good mood? What if God "says" nothing? Does that mean it's a bad idea?  What if what I "heard" is indigestion and not the voice of God at all?

So over the last decade, I've reoriented my decision making around a more objective test: scripture. More specifically, I base it around a question that sounds something like this:

Is what I am about to do (or dreaming about) the best application I know of God's Word applied to the present circumstances?

I have grown to love that question. It covers all those times we wouldn't naturally pray about something but probably should (hey - is my diet at all a reflection of scripture's teaching that my body is God's temple? Does my trip into town involve a faithful use of the resources God has entrusted me with?)

Second, the standard the question embraces is far more objective.  The truth is, God's Word is clear on so many things, whether I am in a good mood or bad mood, whether I "sense" God's presence or not - His Word just kind of lays it on the line.  Knowing how to apply God's Word to the present circumstances is something to pray about and even seek wise counsel about, but it's so much more objective and reliable than waiting for a "feeling" or interpreting the fact that the wind knocked over the umbrella in the back yard as a sign that God wants you to quit your job and move to Tibet.

In fact, it's that question that helped guide me and other leaders through our decision to become a multi-site church and all the change that it involved.

Wondering what question guides you and how you might find the question helpful or not helpful.  What do you think?